Hamilton still not opening Rosberg Christmas cards
Lewis Hamilton has confirmed that Nico Rosberg's 2019 Christmas card went the same way as the previous 3: straight into the #44 stencilled recycling bin.
Rosberg discovering Nachos
Nico Rosberg has discovered he really likes Nachos, especially drizzled in melted Monterrey Jack cheese with a side order of guacamole. (more…)
Rosberg F1 language challenge absence quit admission
Nico Rosberg has admitted the reason he quit F1 was the lack of a new language to address the public from the rostrum in 2017. (more…)
“Whatever,” says Rosberg
Lewis Hamilton’s faint praise damnation of Nico Rosberg’s retirement announcement has been met with the universally acknowledged sign of total indifference. (more…)
Rosberg fans demand panic timetable
Nico Rosberg fans are demanding to know when they should start panicking at the inevitable erosion of their driver’s seemingly insurmountable drivers championship lead. (more…)
Future Mercedes radio communications to be thought in Russian
Mercedes GP are to circumvent the restrictive radio communication rules by instructing their drivers and engineers to contact each other via E.S.P. (more…)
Prost and Senna shortchanged us, say F1 fans
F1 fans have decided the supposed Clash of the Titans rivalry between Ayrton Senna and Alain Prost was nothing of the sort as the pair only hit each other twice. (more…)
Rosberg meant to press rear gun button
Nico Rosberg was in the wrong engine mode at the start of the Spanish Grand Prix because he was too busy trying to operate the rear-facing gun. (more…)
Better not fuck this up from here, God tells Rosberg
I’m not giving you any more lucky breaks so don’t piss this one up against the wall, the Almighty has warned Nico Rosberg. (more…)
Pay drivers not getting fucking tab as well
All the F1 pay drivers told Nico Rosberg to go fuck himself when he asked who was picking up the tab for their recent restaurant excursion. (more…)
Rosberg to drive faster in 2016
Nico Rosberg has figured out that the main reason he lost the 2015 F1 World Drivers title is that he didn’t drive fast enough. (more…)
Rosberg-inspired Marvel superhero to always turn up too late to save the day
Marvel comics are to create a Nico Rosberg inspired character blessed with super powers but appalling punctuality. (more…)
Final Mercedes GP conspiracy theorist retires
The last living human to believe Mercedes GP were favouring Nico Rosberg has decided to quit. (more…)
Hamilton not coming down to my level, complains Rosberg
Nico Rosberg has insisted Lewis Hamilton has to drive at his pace if F1 is to be at all interesting in 2015. (more…)
Does this Double Cheeseburger count as well, asks Rosberg?
Nico Rosberg is desperately hoping the double cheeseburger he just consumed means he now gets *4* times as many points in the season closing Abu Dhabi race. Or he is…
Hamilton purchases magnanimous insurance face
Lewis Hamilton is getting a spare face with a magnanimous expression made in case he loses the F1 World Drivers title to Nico Rosberg. (more…)
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