Mercedes GP Archives - pitflaps.co.uk

Bottas relocates Mercedes magic button

Post author:Ed
Post published:August 2, 2021
Post Category:In Pictures

Bottas relocates Mercedes magic button

Hamilton magic button to be rebranded “Bottas mode”

Post author:Ed
Post published:June 10, 2021
Post Category:Formula 1

Mercedes' "magic" button is to be renamed Bottas from now on so absolutely nobody is left in any doubt as to the likely disaster should anybody be dumb enough to press the bastard.

Mercedes confirm 2020 Hamilton Title

Post author:Ed
Post published:August 29, 2019
Post Category:In Pictures

Mercedes confirm 2020 Hamilton Title

Mercedes 250th anniversary uniforms revealed

Post author:Ed
Post published:July 29, 2019
Post Category:In Pictures

Mercedes 250th anniversary uniforms revealed

Mercedes to double-down on conspiracy theory department

Post author:Ed
Post published:July 12, 2018
Post Category:Formula 1

The Mercedes team are to redouble their conspiracy theory efforts after their Ferrari-are-sending-out-Kimi-to-crash-into-us plot was immediately held up to ridicule. (more…)

Mercedes to deploy Hamilton poetry at championship finale

Post author:Ed
Post published:September 3, 2017
Post Category:Formula 1

Mercedes aren’t scared to use Lewis Hamilton’s poetry against Ferrari in a championship showdown the team have announced. (more…)

Temping better than permanent actually, claims Bottas

Post author:Ed
Post published:January 28, 2017
Post Category:Formula 1

Everyone knows that temporary contracts always work out better than permanent roles, new Mercedes recruit Valtteri Bottas has claimed. (more…)

Future Mercedes radio communications to be thought in Russian

Post author:Ed
Post published:July 18, 2016
Post Category:Formula 1

Mercedes GP are to circumvent the restrictive radio communication rules by instructing their drivers and engineers to contact each other via E.S.P. (more…)

Rosberg meant to press rear gun button

Post author:Ed
Post published:May 26, 2016
Post Category:Formula 1

Nico Rosberg was in the wrong engine mode at the start of the Spanish Grand Prix because he was too busy trying to operate the rear-facing gun. (more…)

Final Mercedes GP conspiracy theorist retires

Post author:Ed
Post published:October 27, 2015
Post Category:Formula 1

The last living human to believe Mercedes GP were favouring Nico Rosberg has decided to quit. (more…)

Hamilton regrets pisstake contract clause

Post author:Ed
Post published:June 4, 2015
Post Category:Formula 1

Lewis Hamilton has regretted consenting to the clause in his new Mercedes contract allowing the team to take the piss out of him when it feels like it. (more…)

8 year old Niki Lauda Christmas list mistakenly becomes press statement

Post author:Ed
Post published:February 1, 2015
Post Category:Formula 1

Niki Lauda’s boyhood Santa Christmas list has mistakenly been put out as a press statement. (more…)

Engine builders finally conquer profit

Post author:Ed
Post published:January 13, 2015
Post Category:Formula 1

F1 engine manufacturers are relieved they’ve found a use for all this flipping money their parent companies keep making. (more…)

Ross Brawn acknowledges Mercedes GP thanks

Post author:Ed
Post published:October 16, 2014
Post Category:In Pictures

Possible Rosberg “foreign” contaminant source located

Post author:Ed
Post published:September 30, 2014
Post Category:In Pictures

Rosberg upsets Hindu Goddess

Post author:Ed
Post published:September 23, 2014
Post Category:Formula 1

Nico Rosberg has done something to upset Jyestha, the Hindu Goddess of misfortune. Just when it seemed he'd got the upper hand in the use of horseshoes and lucky rabbits'…

Briatore F1 advice impact felt

Post author:Ed
Post published:September 9, 2014
Post Category:In Pictures
Post Comments:0 Comments

Ricciardo won some races, apparently

Post author:Ed
Post published:August 27, 2014
Post Category:Formula 1
Post Comments:0 Comments

Some of the 2014 F1 races have been won by Daniel Ricciardo in a Red Bull, it's been revealed. The 25 year old Antipodean crossed the finish line before anyone…