Vettel very sorry for making FIA look hypocritical
Sebastian Vettel has apologized for putting the FIA into the impossible position of having to choose between their own integrity or money. (more…)
Make your fucking minds up, F1 fans told
F1 fans have been told to decide whether they want fast, mean looking cars or overtaking because the stupid dickheads can’t have both, obviously. (more…)
Future driver radio comms allowed if knife wielding maniac enters cockpit
Drivers are allowed to ask for assistance from their engineers over the radio only if their life is being endangered by an armed psychotic, the FIA have ruled. (more…)
2017 rules discussion not as entertaining as promised, complain F1 fans
The 2017 rules discussion F1 teams hoped would wow fans around the world has proved less popular than hoped. (more…)
Thank God all these people didn’t ruin everything, F1 exclaims
F1 is thanking its lucky stars all these unexpected human beings that turned up to the Mexican Grand Prix didn’t ruin everything. (more…)
F1 Fans basically craving Death Race 2000
F1 is poised to ignore the recent fan survey results after they discovered everyone wanted F1 to be more like the 1975 film, Death Race 2000. (more…)
In-season driver graphic design incompetence banned
F1 Drivers are to be banned from demonstrating why they shouldn’t be allowed near a sketch pad and felt-tip pens more than once a year. (more…)
Engine builders finally conquer profit
F1 engine manufacturers are relieved they’ve found a use for all this flipping money their parent companies keep making. (more…)
FIA declare Double Points like when they used to race in South Africa
The FIA have decided double points will be like when everyone happily raced in Apartheid South Africa for years but that’s like, in the past and stuff. (more…)
FIA to make drivers get out and push
F1’s governing body are to make drivers push their cars round the remaining Grand Prix tracks. (more…)
2014 F1 cars basically illegal immigrants
The 2014 F1 regulations are importing a race of alien cars that will cost everyone a fortune and ultimately spell an end to the jobs and livelihoods of dozens of…
Cameraman hit by wheel, “ruining carefree peril for rest of us”
The fucking idiot who apparently can't even see a bloody great 30 kilogram wheel barreling towards him has completely ruined our fun, the Formula 1 media has complained. The man…
Not what it looks like, Todt announces from under desk
Jean Todt was just looking for his glasses actually, upon being spotted under his desk. The bloke inexplicably married to Michelle Yeoh hadn’t been seen since before the Bahrain Grand…