FIA Wile E. Coyote Red Bull nobble blueprint accusation

Two tone generic desert-scape: FIA attempts to slow down the Red Bull Formula 1 team were inspired by a series of slapstick cartoons broadcast in post-war America, writes our fictional comic canine character correspondent, Lupus Murdoch.

Despite the commonly held belief the increasingly hare-brained schemes being deployed over the last few desperate ratings-savings months were solely the brainchild of the retarded, partisan governing body, it’s been revealed that the absurd stratagems were in fact heavily influenced by the infamous Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote cartoons, penned by Chuck Jones between the 40s and 60s.

“Painting a cave opening onto the side of a mountain, buying a pair of rocket-powered roller-skates or magnetizing ball-bearings disguised as bird seed may seem mis-judged inspiration for an organisation charged solely with the regulation of a single form of motorized competition,” cartoon expert, Dilbert Thundercats told us.

Wile E. Coyote

Charlie Whiting ponders his next move

“But the absurd, last-minute, harum-scarum rule-change contrivances of recent races all point to the ravenous moth-eaten wolf’s ludicrously desperate schemes as the blatant progenitor of these similarly hare-brained gerrymandered initiatives.”

The flightless bird-fixated wild dog inhabitant of an anonymous South West American desert first appeared in a Warner Bros. short in 1948 wherein the canine protagonist repeatedly and resolutely fails to catch the aforementioned perpetually-in-motion, tarmac-hugging avian in a doomed series of progressively elaborate schemes.

Yet despite the feral canine’s perpetual failures, it’s suggested the preposterous madcap imagination on display actually inspired the F1 governing body’s response to its own similarly vexing question of how to stop the erstwhile drinks company sponsored petrol-powered projectile from winning absolutely everything.

“Mark my words: an, “accidental” spillage of ACME quick-setting cement in the Hungarian Red Bull pit box or the lowering of distracting gifts – Little Britain DVD’s for Seb and the Mongoose Redemption BMX with rear stunt pegs and Skyway mag wheels for Mark – using fishing rods over the start-finish gantry and it’s obvious what they’re up to,” he added.

Red Bull RB7 scrutineering

“And don’t come out till you’ve found at least 3 things wrong with it”

Green lights for Ferrari’s proposed car-sized long bow starting system and Mclaren’s similarly controversial see-saw boulder pit-stop personnel kybosh mechanism added fuel to the Looney-Tunes stymie strategy accusation though the governing body itself remained tight-lipped.

“Meep! Meep!”, went Jean Todt to a phalanx of journalists before blinking, sticking his tongue out and rushing away in a cloud of dust.

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