Oirland: Guinness, the famous stout brewer and publisher of human and animal freakery for the benefit of voyeuristic dullards everywhere yesterday confirmed the world record youngest ever cloud of noxious bum gas from assembled drivers atop the Italian GP podium.
State-of-the-art gas spectrometers sited just behind the Monza podium picked up the methane outburst approximately 14 seconds after champagne release confirming that it was the youngest ever bottom burp released from a Grand Prix podium.
This therefore beat the previous record from the Hungarian Grand Prix of 2003 when the 1,2,3 of Alonso, Raikkonen and Montoya produced a collective air-biscuit a few months’ staler overall than the fetid 2008 Italian GP’s collective rectal retort.
Covered in this much spunk!
An attempt to also claim the youngest ever ejaculant outburst at a Grand Prix first 3 celebratory shindig failed however when it was revealed Torro Rosso co-owner Gerhard Berger got a bit carried away on the podium and ruined the result by about 50 years.