Mclaren to lure Vettel with family size Haribo and PS3

Woking: Reports are suggesting that Mclaren engine partner Mercedes Benz are prepared to break the bank for young Red Bull hotshoe tot, Sebastian Vettel in a bid to not replace departing Spanish foot- stamper, Alonso with someone transparently mediocre.


oochy-coochy-coo!

The German Red Bull protégé, former BMW tester and junior bus pass holder has impressed this season and Mercedes are said to have a “significant” budget to prise him loose of his current berth, despite the £1000000 billion fine Mclaren incurred earlier this year for willfully employing an idiot.

“I know (the fine) was a big hit but I think we can afford him. I’m not saying we could stretch to an XBOX 360 as well but if he’s polite, agrees to wear the right hat and doesn’t make Ron cry I think he’s a good fit”, said an insider.

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